Anodyne
Sunday, April 22, 2007
 

"Dear Sir,

I have received notice of your 'little problem' - as we in the business are euphemistically calling it - and write to offer my assistance. I am Wallis Warfield Simpson Helps English and have extensive experience as a trained rodent eradicator. I propose the following plan of action:

1. I will arrive in my high-tech plastic box carried by my human servant to your place of employment or residence on a date at your leisure;
2. My human servant will set my tech box on the floor and will open the magic gate;
3. My humans will take you for that beverage that makes them giddy; and
4. I will perform for several hours my main function in life.

It would do me a great honour if you would consider my services. I suspect in one evening I would drive the little problem out of your life.

Sincere regards,
Wallis Warfield Simpson Helps English (and human servants)"
- posted by cjb @ 1:06 PM


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