Anodyne
Friday, July 22, 2011
 
Insert in my obituary, please:  "Yelling for society since 1970."
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
 

Waste My Time, Please -- special bonus lunchtime edition, and the general tenor of the day

Our man's on his way back to work from the deli, with a coffee in one hand and a croissantwich in the other.  He passes the signboard of a neighboring business, which, seconds later, catches a pretty good gust of wind and topples over.

WOMAN LOCKING UP HER BIKE RIGHT BESIDE THE SIGN:  Hey!  HEY!

CJB:  Yes....?

WLUHBRBTS:  You dropped something!

CJB [checks hands, lunch change]:  No, I'm okay, thanks!

WLUHBRBTS [indicating signboard]:  I said you dropped something!

CJB:  I didn't "drop" anything.  But the wind might have.

WLUHBRBTS:  You could still pick it up!

CJB:  If my hands were free, sure.  Say, you're not holding anything.

WLUHBRBTS:  That's all right.  I'M DOING IT FOR YOU.

CJB:  Hey, thanks for minding my business.  You might want to tilt it a bit, so the wind doesn't get it again.

WLUHBRBTS:  ASSHOLE!

CJB:  Thanks for the feedback  You're a good citizen.

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